


it's nice to have a friend

by breakable____heaven



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Inspired by Taylor Swift, One Shot, Post-TLJ, Song fic, taylo, this is my first fic in 15 years and first ever published one so please be nice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-27 10:00:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21390295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/breakable____heaven/pseuds/breakable____heaven
Summary: After Palpatine announces his return and Hux defects to serve as his right hand man, bringing most of his subordinates with him, the Resistance and the First Order are forced to work together to defeat the newly-resurrected Empire. If they're to have any chance against a Force user as powerful as Palpatine, Ben and Rey will have to put up the fight of their lives.Still scorned from their final moments together in the throne room, they begrudgingly agree to meet on an abandoned ice planet to train for the impending battle. Before long, they realize that isolation may not be as bad as they thought.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey & Ben Solo, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 3
Kudos: 37





	it's nice to have a friend

**Author's Note:**

> hiiii so this is my first ever published fic and the first one i've written (and finished) since i was a pre-teen and i can't believe i'm doing this buuuuuuuuut yeah, here we are! i feel like a lot of taylor's songs are very reylo-ish, especially this one, so if anyone likes this maybe i will write some more (???) anyway, hope you enjoy! follow me on twitter @_kylo__ben_ for more on my descent into fandom hell as we await TROS

———————————————  
_school bell rings, walk me home_  
_sidewalk chalk covered in snow_  
_lost my gloves, you give me one_  
_“wanna hang out?” yeah, sounds like fun_  
_video games, you pass me a note_  
_sleeping in tents_  
_it’s nice to have a friend_  
_it’s nice to have a friend_  
———————————————

__  
Today’s walk home from training seemed more bitter than usual, though each of their walks home always seemed more bitter than the last, so it was difficult to tell if it genuinely was. Of all the planets the Resistance could have chosen to hide them out on, they’d certainly picked a harsh one. The chilliness made Ben a bit crabby - he had never liked the cold much - but Rey loved it. It was the opposite of the planet she’d grown up on in every way; Jakku was all sun and sand and intense, unforgiving heat, and this planet was nothing but ice, wind, and virtually relentless precipitation. Though they’d been entrenched in it for weeks now, Rey hadn’t yet gotten past her excitement over the snow and often reveled in its newness, looking at the snowflakes as they collected on her sleeves on the walk home. Secretly, Ben found the way she marveled at it somewhat endearing; sometimes he would hear her laughter through the window after dinner and peek out through the curtains to see what was going on, only to find her alone, packing snowballs and throwing them into the nothingness.  


As they walked back towards their quarters in silence, Ben could hear Rey’s teeth chattering from the cold. She’d swaddled herself in wraps and scarves to fend it off, but her body still hadn’t adjusted to the climate, and nothing she layered around herself seemed to be enough. Her bare hands hung by her sides in fists, clenched against the air. 

“Your fingers are going to freeze if you don’t wear gloves,” he remarked. “Did the alliance really send you to this frozen hell without any gloves?” 

“I have gloves,” she said defensively. “I just.... don’t know where they’ve gone.” 

“You’re not going to be able to grip your lightsaber well if your fingers fall off,” he retorted. “It’s not as though we have easy access to prosthetics on this barren wasteland of a planet.” 

Rey stopped in her tracks. 

“Fall off?” she asked, wide-eyed. “That can happen?”

Ben smirked, amused by her shock. Their conversations outside of the sparring ring were sparse, so these moments were hard to come by. He always made an extra effort to take them in when they happened. “In the cold, yes,” he said. “It’s called frostbite. You’re tempting it now.”

He slid one of his gloves off and held it out to her. “Here, take one of mine. At least if we both lose our fingers, neither of us will have an unfair advantage when we train.”

She felt an instinctual urge to scoff and quicken her pace to get ahead of him, just to prove that she wasn’t as helpless as he was making her out to be. She’d kept herself alive _just fine_ all those years on Jakku without anyone’s assistance - she wasn’t about to start taking it now. Her hands were cold, though, fingertips going numb from the incessant bite of the air.

She took it from his hand and slid it on, immediately grateful have a little less bare skin. God, how she hated having to admit that he was right.

“Thanks,” she mumbled. 

They continued the journey towards their huts, resuming their silence for the rest of the walk. The worst part of the day was about to begin, and approaching it filled both of them with dread: after they went their separate ways, they would sit in their huts alone, quietly eating their rations, reading books, or, in Rey’s case, tinkering with some old pieces of junk she’d found on the Falcon and brought with her so she’d have something to work on in her spare time. Even for Rey, who had spent most of her life alone, something about the cold and snow made it feel particularly lonely.

As they approached the fork in the road where they always split off for the evening, something struck her; perhaps it was the gesture of sharing the glove, which, for Ben, was quite grand, or perhaps she was just growing tired of the routine, but before she even had time to process what the feeling was, words began to tumble out of her mouth.

“Would you like to come to my hut… instead of going to yours?” She almost stopped there, embarrassed by her tone and certain he was going to say no, but she continued on. “I could use some help on something. A mechanical… thing. And we could have our rations together. If… you want.” 

The question caught Ben by surprise. It had been a long time since anyone sought his company, the last person being… well, Rey, actually, when she reached out to him after her vision in the cavern. Come to think of it, she may have been the only person he’d ever known who had asked for his time and conversation without a hidden motive or some desire to manipulate him for their own gain. 

He thought on it for a moment, a natural distrust bubbling lowly in his stomach. It was hard to believe she wanted to spend time with him, but he decided to push those thoughts away for now and take the chance while he had it. “Yes,” he replied. “I would like that.” 

That night, they stayed up later than either of them had in years. The junk Rey had taken from the Falcon turned out to be a few of Ben’s childhood holo games. He knew exactly how to fix them and taught her how; she’d been stuck in her repairs because she’d never seen a holo game before and thus was completely unfamiliar with the technology. After they powered the games on, they played for hours, laughing and talking about all the other types of toys Ben had played with a child and the activities young Rey had made up to entertain herself when night came and there was no longer enough light to scavenge in. They both fell asleep by the fireplace, and Rey dreamt of herself as a scrawny 10-year-old, playing hide and seek with a young Ben in the husk of her favorite AT-AT.

———————————————  
_light pink sky, up on the roof_  
_sun sinks down, no curfew_  
_twenty questions, we tell the truth_  
_you’ve been stressed out lately_  
_yeah, me too_  
_something gave you the nerve_  
_to touch my hand_  
_it’s nice to have a friend_  
_it’s nice to have a friend_  
———————————————

After the first night, Rey and Ben spent every night for the next two months like that, sharing meals and stories, playing games, and falling asleep on opposite sides of the smoldering fireplace. It surprised them both how quickly they'd grown attached to one another. After the betrayal they’d weathered in the past, each had expected this training period to be tedious and tense, and perhaps it was at the beginning. But once they’d taken that initial step in a positive direction - the sharing of the glove, which led to the sharing of their company - something about being together suddenly felt natural, like a puzzle with all of its pieces perfectly in place.

One afternoon after training, they left the arena to find the planet’s seemingly endless snowstorm had finally broken, leaving a clear pink sky in its place. It was the first time they’d seen it clear in the three months they’d been there, and the sudden change served as a reminder that there was more change on the horizon. At some point, they were going to have to leave this place and face Palpatine and his reinvigorated Empire, potentially losing their lives in the process. For Rey, the feeling of dread it brought was somewhat familiar; she’d felt it once before when she fled Jakku with Finn, trading the known for the unknown, although it was only a dream she had to give up on then. This time, she had a nagging feeling that there was something solid she would be leaving behind.

They huddled together on the walk home and discussed what they wanted to do that evening, ultimately deciding to sit on the roof and appreciate the pink sky and the stillness it brought. It was likely to be the last stillness they’d find for a while - potentially the last they’d ever find.

Once they’d settled into their spots on top of Rey’s hut, things went quiet, which was abnormal. Rey, it had turned out, was a talker; after she became a little more comfortable with him, Ben realized it was almost impossible to ever shut her up. He attributed it to all the years she’d spent alone with no one to share her thoughts with. He didn’t mind a bit that he was the one who got to hear them. 

Before long, the silence was starting to make Ben uncomfortable. He was always waiting for the other shoe to drop, and the lack of conversation made him wonder if he’d done something to upset her. He racked his brain for any possible missteps from the last few days but came up empty handed. Nothing had seemed out of the ordinary, and apart from one moment during practice where he became a bit bitter after she bested him - though he was secretly quite proud of her for doing so - everything had been as jovial and light as it always was. 

“You don’t have much to say this evening,” he finally said, looking over at Rey, who was staring off into the distance. 

“I don’t,” she replied, not bothering to turn his way. He read it as annoyance, but in reality, Rey was keeping her eyes averted because she was afraid the sight of him just then - hair blowing in the soft breeze, the large golden sun sinking in the pink sky beside him, that face in its glow - would be too much to bear. Frankly, every glance at him had started to feel like a little much.

Ben had been growing into his softer side over the last few months, but Rey’s silence and presumed indifference started to cause his former self to seep back in around its fragile edges. He started feeling angry at her, thoughts shooting off in ten different directions. Had he been wrong to trust her? Did she bring him up here to tell him that she hated him and would be abandoning him here? Had this friendship been all in his head? Was she manipulating him into liking her so that she could use it to her advantage? The sound of it all swirling in his mind made him want to jump down off the roof and carve a crack into the earth between them.

Thoughts had been swirling in Rey’s mind, too, but a very different kind. At the center of them all was the realization that she needed to look over at him, even if the sight swallowed her whole. If she didn’t take it now, she might never have the chance to know what he looked like in the light of that sunset, and she didn’t want to have to lie awake at night wondering what she missed. She’d already spent too much of her life doing that. 

“I can’t stop thinking about how we'll have to leave soon,” she said quietly, turning towards him. “I know we have to. It’s what we’ve been training for all this time. And I know the Resistance needs us. But I’m not sure if I want to go.”

Ben immediately let out a small sigh, her words smoothing over the anger that had started rising up in him like a tide washing away footprints in the sand. _She doesn’t hate me,_ he thought to himself. _She’s afraid. But not of me._

“I’ve been thinking about it too,” he replied. It was all he could manage to get out before Rey continued on.

“Things are so simple here. It’s all that out there that’s tangled up,” she said, motioning towards the sky. “Sometimes it’s easy to forget that we’re even still a part of it. That anything exists apart from our huts and our rations and that old arena. Now I get why Luke liked being on that island so much. ” 

A small smile crept onto Ben’s face. It made him happy to know that there was some part of her that liked it here and wanted to stay. In a perfect world, they could. But that was out of the question.

Ben knew the realities of what Palpatine was likely planning. Until the Emperor was defeated, there would always be a chance he would find them and kill them. Thinking of it made his smile melt right back off. 

“We are a part of it,” he said dryly. “We only came to this place so we could become strong enough to take him on. And soon we’ll have to.” He noticed his words had brought a scowl to her face, so he quickly followed up with something lighter. “After we defeat him, you can have your choice of secluded planets and eat all the rations you want,” he joked. “But we have to get Palpatine out of the way first.”

Rey shifted a little. “What if we’re not good enough?” she asked, watching her feet as they dangled over the roof’s edge. It was a valid concern; Palpatine was one of the strongest force users of all time, and there was no way of knowing if the two of them - strong as they were, especially when fighting alongside each other - would be a match for his ability. But there was something deeper within that fear that Rey had been turning over like a stone in her mind for days, maybe weeks, unsure of what to make of it. It was her worst case scenario, the darkest possible outcome in a situation that was going to end darkly no matter what. 

“What if something happens to you?”

It came out quiet and shaky, as though she thought saying it aloud would somehow make it fate. 

The question made Ben’s breath catch in his throat. It was the softest thing he’d ever heard, but also the saddest. She wasn’t just afraid of losing, he realized. She was afraid of losing _him_. It had been a while since he’d had much invested in his own mortality, and he’d even expected that he would probably die in the battle to come, but it suddenly struck him that his death would hurt her, and hurting her was the very last thing he ever wanted to do. 

Unconsciously, Ben reached out and put his hand over hers, squeezing it gently. He’d wanted to do that hundreds of times over the last few weeks but always held back, nervous that she would recoil and the delicate, innocent game of house they’d been playing would crumble in his hands. But something in her tone just then had given him the impression that she might not pull away after all, and he found himself making the move before he had a chance to reconsider. 

As their skin touched, the bond opened up, creating an open flow between their minds. It had been a while since they’d allowed it to happen, but straight away they met in the middle again, like entering the same familiar living room through two different doors. They sat in the buzz for a moment before Rey invited him over to her side. It seemed there was one memory in particular she was pushing towards him, so Ben emptied his head so he could explore it fully. 

* * *

There had been one night a couple of weeks back where the storm hit an ugly peak, bringing air so cold that a full and roaring fireplace did almost nothing to temper it. Vicious winds blew hail against the walls and window panes, making the house sound like it was under attack from all sides. Ben remembered this night well, though the hail was much quieter in his memory, and at first, he wasn’t sure why she was showing it to him. But then it became clear. 

The cold had been so strong that neither of them could fall asleep. As it was Rey’s memory he was experiencing, he now understood that the sounds he’d found innocuous had been scaring her, reminding her of the thieves who used to sneak into her resting places at night to steal the few belongings she had while she slept. Through her eyes, he watched himself suggest that they huddle up next to each other for warmth. “Since we don’t have any tauntauns to get inside of, this’ll be the next best thing,” he’d joked, but Rey didn’t get it. _Family thing,_ she guessed to herself. 

She didn’t have to say anything for him to sense her hesitation. “I won’t try to kill you, I promise,” he said softly. “It’s just a heat thing. Physics. It’s… stuff you learn if you don’t grow up alone in the desert.” 

Eventually she agreed, pulling her mat over next to his and climbing back under the covers as quickly as she could. He curled his body around hers like a lanky cocoon, and finally, there it was: the thing she was trying to show him. As she lay there that night, knowing Ben would be right there beside her if any thieves did try to force their way in, an unfamiliar feeling had come over her, so unfamiliar that it took her until moments before she fell asleep to figure out the right word for it: _safe. _

* * *

Overwhelmed, Ben quickly responded by throwing memory after memory her way: the way he’d admired her throwing snowballs all alone, the times he watched her sleep after she passed out next to him in the middle of a holo game, the waves of pride he got when she learned something new in the training ring, the tender feeling in his chest that would rise up as she laughed at one of his jokes on the walk home. They were coming so rapidly Rey could barely process them all. When he finished, something hung in the air between them that was thicker than the snowfall on its worst day. 

Rey threw her arms around him, clinging to him like a magnet. He wrapped his around her tightly, pulling her even closer against him, and he could feel her relax as he did so, like she was letting out a breath she’d been holding in for a very long time. Eyes closed, he felt her pawing at the bond again and made himself open to whatever message she wanted to send. It was just one word, over and over again: _safe. Safe. Safe. Safe. Safe. _

———————————————  
_church bells ring, carry me home_  
_rice on the ground, looks like snow_  
_call my bluff, call you "babe"_  
_have my back, yeah, every day_  
_feels like home, stay in bed_  
_the whole weekend_  
_it’s nice to have a friend_  
_it’s nice to have a friend_  
———————————————

The war was unkind, as wars are, but it was won. 

Many didn’t survive, but somehow both Rey and Ben were able to count themselves among the ones who mourned, not those who were mourned for. Ben lost a hand, but it was an acceptable sacrifice if it meant they got to walk away with their lives. 

When it came time to decide who would lead the new democracy that began to take shape after Palpatine’s death, it was Rose who ended up taking on the role. Many had expected it would be Ben Solo, or even Rey, but neither wanted it. Some had argued that Solo belonged in charge, with his Skywalker bloodline making him a natural leader, but Ben had a different idea of where it was that he belonged. 

Rey and Ben stuck around until the dust settled to ensure that nothing went awry as the galaxy adjusted to the new rules that governed it, but as soon as they could back away, they did. As co-pilots, they hopped in the Falcon and sailed off to a planet far away from the politics, armies, and power. A place they could have to themselves - not untraceable, not out of reach if they needed to be called upon again, but somewhere they could be alone. 

They married in a simple ceremony and moved into a house with land for farming and plenty of space for sparring matches. It was roomy and warm, with shelves of holo games they played against each other in the evenings. In a surprise to even himself, Ben took up an interest in cooking and made interesting meals from ingredients Rey had never tried, some which she liked, some she didn’t. 

In her rare moments alone, sometimes Rey thought about all the nights she spent lying awake in the skeletons of long-forgotten ships, trying to imagine what a home would feel like if she ever found one. As it turned out, it was something far beyond what the boundaries of her imagination had allowed her to dream up. Home, she’d figured out, was a place in some ways - the special type of place she’d always thought it would be, one made just for her - but mostly, it was a person. She slept soundly next to hers at night now.


End file.
